By: Zachary Draves
It is already hard enough to be an LGBTQ+ person with a huge swath of the American electorate attaching the community with labels such as “groomer” and hundreds of state laws being passed that drastically roll back decades of progress, that Dwight Howard of all people should be the least of all concerns.
But alas here we are.
(Courtesy: Getty Images)
The eight time NBA all-star is facing accusations by a Georgia man, who claimed that Howard and another man sexually assaulted him in July 2021. In his civil lawsuit, the man states that he and Howard met on Instagram, exchanged explicit text messages, and set up to meet at Howard’s home. It was there that the man says Howard and the other man forced him to take part in a sexual activity that he didn’t want to do.
The lawsuit alleges that the man “was trapped in Defendant’s bedroom and believed that he would suffer imminent bodily harm if he resisted Defendant’s sexual advances”. It also states that he “felt extremely violated and humiliated, and was in complete shock.”
Howard has admitted to a sexual encounter, but claims that it was consensual, that this is about money, and has requested that the lawsuit be dismissed. On Monday, his team put out a statement that read in part:
This is a civil case that was made public for profit. In this case, the accuser is solely suing Dwight Howard and has refrained from suing the other party in which he claims to be involved. It is important to know that these matters were NEVER about sexual assault. This was merely about money and greed. Such individuals, have made continuous attempts to elicit payment from Dwight. This has resulted in intimidation of not only Dwight, his family and friends have also been targeted as well.
As the case proceeds and longstanding rumors about Howards’ sexuality spread across social media, he has gone more on the defensive on a recent Instagram Live where he laughingly brushed off the accusations under the guise of privacy.
“Whatever I’m doing in my bedroom is my damn business,” he said. “Whatever you are doing in your bedroom is your damn business. I ain’t gotta tell nobody where I put my wood at.
Under normal circumstances, Howard’s private affairs should be just that, private. Also if he is gay, that is also his business and he should be able to come out on his own terms and on his own time. However, while he certainly deserves the presumption of innocence as anyone else, Howard is not helping himself by laughing off accusations of sexual assault and he may not know it, but he is inadvertently disparaging the LGBTQ+ community and male survivors of sexual assault with his response.
(Courtesy: Ashley Landis/Associated Press)
For too long, queer people have had to bear the brunt of bigotry and prejudice. Much of that open hostility is rooted in the idea that somehow queer people are “deviant” when it comes to sex, somehow constitute a threat to sexual and relational norms, and somehow should not be in the presence of children.
Never mind the fact that queer people are disproportionately represented as victims/survivors of sexual violence and have been subjected to historic mistreatment on the part of law enforcement and social services, which has exacerbated those inequities.
Those attitudes have led to not only a surge in anti-LGBTQ legislation in recent years, but also anti-LGBTQ+ sentiment in the acts of bullying, harassment, and violence. Thus making it even more difficult for people to come out and live their truths, which also includes the world of sports.
While sports has made significant inroads in creating safer and inclusive environments from the locker room to the front office, there are still plenty of social forces at work to keep athletes, especially male athletes, in the closet. Part of which is hysteria and paranoia around a perceived sexual deviancy by gay men in spaces such as locker rooms (“being looked at naked”, “I’m afraid to shower with him”, etc.), which is connected to the whole notion that men in general cannot control themselves when it comes to sex.
That along with the idea that men and boys are supposed to be tough, strong, and emotionless leads some to disbelieve men and boys when they come forward to say that they have been sexually assaulted. In a world in which rape culture permeates and victims/survivors across the board, especially women and girls, are blamed and shamed, 1 in 6 men bear the brunt of that horrifically unnecessary burden.
Since this is a civil case, Dwight Howard’s liability is yet to be determined, but his stubbornness and his seemingly willing to reduce sexual assault to a joke is not acceptable and damages those who have been victimized in the process.
For a man who was a three time Defensive Player of the Year, his defense right now is lagging.